I just realized I’ve been composing my short stories all wrong. Firstly, they drag–not enough action. Secondly, there’s not enough suspense. And thirdly, they’re just way too long.
Here’s what I’m talking about. Read this short story from When Will Jesus Bring The Pork Chops by George Carlin and see if you don’t agree. I think he’s got it down.
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Here’s a challenge for you. It should be easier for the younger ones to complete. We older folks should find it a bit more challenging.
The challenge is to write your biography in 400 words or less. Mine came in at 399, but I had to do a bit of editing. Below, you can read what I wrote. Then you it will be your turn to share.
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Folks, we should have called it a day when we signed our citations. But, we didn’t. We were just getting started. After all the excitement, I’m sure the old busybody on the northeast corner of Oak and Maple was all tuckered out and down for a nap. If she was, she didn’t stay there.
Shotgun shells have a quantity of gunpowder that Pete figured we could use. He had seen it on TV, whereby some genius of a guy had used the black substance as a fuse to ignite a larger pile of gunpowder, creating an explosion. Pete didn’t want an explosion to blow up the gopher, but he figured that burning gasoline would be more toxic than just the fumes that were confined to the gopher’s underground home. It sounded plausible to me. Continue reading
